Whether you’re a guy or a girl, there’s bound to be a few rules here to make your life easier and make you laugh.
More here: Battle of the Sexes
25. Don’t give us 50 rules when 25 will do.
24. Check your oil.
23. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
22. Nothing says “I love you” like a blowjob.
21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
20. Yes and no are perfectly acceptable answers.
19. Share the closet.
18. Share the bathroom.
17. No, he doesn’t know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries.
16. Ask for what you want. Subtle hints don’t work.
15. Your brother is an idiot.
14. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don’t expect us to like it.
13. You have too many shoes.
12. You have enough clothes.
11. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
10. Shopping is not everybody’s idea of a good time.
9. Sunday = sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
8. Dogs are better than cats.
7. Get rid of your cat. And no, it’s not different, its just like every other cat.
6. He’s never thinking about “The Relationship.”
5. Sometimes, he’s not thinking about you. Live with it.
4. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
3. Don’t make us guess.
2. Don’t cut your hair. Ever.
1. Learn to work the toilet seat; if it’s up, put it down.
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